Barbara Wilson has vast experience in this area. She has also written The Invisible Bond and is the former director of sexual health education for the Alternatives Pregnancy Resource Center in Sacramento. She speaks nationwide to youth and adults with her message of sexual healing, and she teaches frequently in the women’s ministry at the multi-campus Bayside Church in Northern California.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Today is a blogging book review day. I am reviewing "Kiss Me Again" by Barbara Wilson. This book was provided for review by WaterBrook Multnomah.
I have been our church's wedding coordinator for several years and have had the pleasure of assisting my husband in performing weddings both in and out of our church. Mostly it is fun and exciting. Always it is a lot of work :)
But I have noticed a trend over the years that bothers me. It bothers me as a woman, as a wife, and as a Christian. I have noticed that there has been a huge attitude shift towards living or sleeping together before marriage. It just isn't that big of a deal to people anymore. I realize that this is something that has always happened, but it used to be that even though people did it - they still knew it was wrong and felt guilt over it. Nowadays there are many people who either don't care or don't think that it is wrong. Some women get pregnant and wait to get married until the baby is born because they still want a big wedding someday - it's all about the beautiful dress and fancy party. Much more thought and planning is given to the wedding than is the actual marriage. This is happening out of the church and sadly it is happening in the church.
God designed the sanctity of marriage for many reasons. It doesn't matter if we agree with Him or not - it is God's decree. His requirement that we wait until marriage is actually a loving form of protection He has provided for us. He desires to protect our hearts and our spirits. God isn't just making up a bunch of rules for us to live by because He wants to be a tyrant. He knows us and He knows how we work. He knows what will damage us and He desires the best for us. But somehow when our society thinks of "laws" and "rules" we think of oppression and submission. We want to do it our own way, our own situation is "different" and we go on our own way not even realizing how we are inviting all kinds of harm and hurt into our hearts. We choose to only live in the moment.
Barbara Wilson, in her book "Kiss Me Again" addresses all the issues that intimacy before marriage bring after the marriage. She shares how she has counseled many women who now in marriage relationships have lost their desire for intimacy. This book is also a "workbook" that teaches you how to break free from the invisible bonds our past choices/experiences have placed upon us.
While this topic isn't one that is easy to talk about, there is a great need for it. This isn't a light read. If you struggle with your past se*x*ual history you will find this book helpful. Perhaps this book would be a catalyst to opening conversations within women's Bible study's and prayer groups. Every church library would benefit by having this book available. If you would like to purchase it for yourself or your church library you can go here, here, or here.
Waterbrook press has also given me a copy of this book to give away. If you would like a copy of this book, email me a rgryan(at)nnu(dot)edu. The first email I get will get the book and I will not announce a winner on my blog. Confidentiality, you know.