Thursday, December 3, 2009
Searching. . .
Over the years it seems to me that I often hear people saying, "It doesn't "feel" like Christmas" or "I just can't seem to get into the Christmas spirit". In fact, those are words I have said myself. For whatever reason I tend to think that flipping the calender page from November to December should fan some Christmas fairy dust over me and immediately put me into a Hallmark Christmas movie mood.
The problem is - that doesn't happen.
As I reflect back over the years of Christmas in my life I have realized something. Memories always hold the best and warmest things and somehow put the "messier" parts of life deeper away - perhaps more of a proper perspective. All the Christmases that I thought were perfect also contained some of the not so pretty parts of life on earth that we all have to deal with. It's just that the memories of those things have faded more than the rest. They don't stand out to me. Just the good stuff remains.
Instead of searching so hard for the "feeling" this year, I think I will just stop. I think instead I will settle for looking at the Christ Child - who is after all, the point. And as life happens around me, I will just keep focused on Him. And trust that Christmas isn't a "feeling" or a "mood".
It is a fact.
The surest thing I know.
I don't suppose any of this makes sense to anyone else - but these words have been swirling around in my head today and they had to make their way out. Blogging is a great way of expressing feelings and thoughts but it is so public and we all know there are things that can't be blogged about. So if you read this and think "huh?", well, just know there are words that I can't write. But God is working in my heart and my head and I'm starting to put pieces together, bit by bit.
I hope that you focus on Jesus this season too. If you have any suggestions or ideas you are using to do that, leave me a comment - I would love to read them.